| 02 September 2009
To: Jim Schwartz, Head Coach, Detroit Lions, NFL
From: A concerned fan and blogger
RE: Semantics belong in the study of linguistics, not in the NFL
Jim,
The following is straight from Lions' PR department (Bold emphasis is mine):
Following today's walkthrough, Lions Head Coach Jim Schwartz informed the media that QB Matthew Stafford will begin the game at Buffalo and that QB Daunte Culpepper's availability will be a game-time decision.
Jim, Jim, Jim. I thought we were finally and forever done with this careful to the point of inanity phrasing. Why did you have to fall back on "begin" instead of "starter" again?
As a life long Lions fan (What can I say? It's my cross to bear. We all have vices, right? The Lions are one of mine...maybe the biggest.) I've seen damn near every coach who came through Detroit get hung up on silly ass turns of phrase. Despite what NFL coaches might think, we're not stupid. We fans can see right through your BS. And claiming the starting QB "begins" the game is pure, unadulterated, bullshit!
I've been loathe to call you out, as you've, for the most part, handled the God awful Lions job well. I've agreed with most of your decisions (Though we need to talk about keeping Stan Kwan. What were you thinking?), even taking Matthew Stafford 1st overall. But when it comes to deciding a STARTER at the QB position, just admit you don't want to tell the media. It's that damn simple.
As someone who's seen coaches come and go, most of whom paved their way out of town by acting coy when dealing with the media, let me give you a piece of advice.
Please. Stop. With. The. Moronic. Semantics. IMMEDIATELY!
You'll thank me later.
Toodles,
Big Al
PS: Seriously, what was up with keeping Kwan on staff? Does he have compromising pictures? Married to your daughter? Married to Mr. Ford's daughter? Saved your life once? Gives a kick ass interview? Is a great brown noser? Makes a mean apple cobbler? Make you laugh? Felt sorry for him? Because I'd really like to know...
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