| 12 November 2009
Is it kosher to give an entire franchise a Facepalm Award? When it's the Detroit Lions, it's as kosher as it gets.
During the Lions loss to the Seahwaks, I spent the 2nd through 4th quarters in a state of continuous facepalm. What follows is how I spent my late Sunday afternoon, thank you very much!
Huh? Stafford throws a pick!
No way! Stafford throws another pick!
ANOTHER?
NOT AGAIN! NONONONONO!
Finally, in my best Jean-Luc Picard-like style, I had to break out the dreaded...DOUBLE FACEPALM!
Number 5 for a pick 6? Please, I'm begging you. Kill me now...
My role model, Homer Simpson once described the suckage of his favorite team as, "That team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked."
He had to have been talking about the Lions, right? The loss to Seattle was emblematic of the past decade of Detroit Lions football. A suck-tacular monument to suck.
Homer just has to be a Lions fan. He shows all the symptoms...
So rather than splitting hairs, and trying to pin down a few players or coaches for a Facepalm, I'm just going to give one to the whole God damn shootin' match!
Winner of the "Facepalm to End All Facepalms": William Clay Ford and his Detroit Lions.
When the suck is so purvasive, so thorough, so complete, it takes down an entire franchise down a black hole of despair, there can be no argument. The Lions have no problem losing as an entity. They sure as Hell can win Facepalms as an entity.
Way to go, Lions! You take all the fun out of award nominations and presentations.
In a perfect world, I wouldn't have to hand out Facepalm Awards at all. I hope next week it'll be a semi-perfect world, and I'll be back to handing out individual Facepalms.
Wishful thinking, I know.
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